How to Be a Better Friend, Spouse, or Relative to Someone with FM or a Chronic Pain Condition

Intimacy & Relationships, , , ,

How to be a better friend, spouse or relative to someone with FM or a chronic pain condition.

Do you know someone who was diagnosed with fibromyalgia (FM) or a chronic pain illness?  Perhaps they are disabled from working due to several conditions associated with these illnesses. Sometimes it’s difficult to know what to expect of yourself and the person you care about with the chronic illness.  Perhaps the following practical suggestions can help you better support your friend, spouse, or relative who has FM or a chronic pain condition.

Educate Yourself

FM is a pain amplification condition. One’s central nervous system is sensitized to experience a lot more pain than others would under similar conditions. For instance, for someone with osteoarthritis and rheumatoid arthritis, as well as other conditions, those conditions are much more painful for them than for someone who doesn’t have FM. It’s as if the “pain switches of the brain get locked on.” As you educate yourself, you’ll be less likely to blunder into saying things like, “It’s all in your head.” (Medical research has shown, for instance, that there is more Substance P [which facilitates the transmission of pain] in FM patients’ spinal cords. Also, they have significantly reduced dopamine synthesis in multiple brain regions.)

Continue reading on fmcpaware.org

 

Related articles

A Pained Life: Timing My Pain

Independent Living, ,

time

by Carol Levy, Columnist

I was sitting at a table with some people I knew, slightly.

I did not know how much of my situation they knew, but the issue came up about my not being able to work.  I told them about the pain that comes from any consistent use of my eyes for more than 10 to 20 minutes before the pain becomes too severe for me to continue.

They immediately came up with suggestions, most of them centered on using a timer.

“Set it for 15 minutes so you will have to stop,” they suggested.

That’s a good idea.  In fact, I came up it with a long time ago.  The only problem is, it’s a lot easier in concept then reality.

I am reading a mystery, my favorite kind of story.  The book is getting exciting, the clues mounting, the name of the person “who dunnit” to be disclosed in… wait, bringgg!

Off goes the timer.  I can’t stop now.  I have to find out who did it.

I know better, but I think, as I often do, five more minutes won’t make a difference. 

But of course, it does.

Full Story

I’ve thought of using a timer myself for some activities, like working at the computer. That has seemed obvious to me but I hadn’t considered it for other tasks around the house or running errands. I think it might be something to definately try. I do find that I may have the energy to let’s say, go grocery shopping but then find that the last half I’m literally hanging off the shopping cart and just begging to make it to the car.

The idea of pacing can be difficult for us because we want to push through when we’re doing good and it can be difficult to recognize the line we cross that takes us into the descent of pain. How about you…what strategies do you find helpful for pacing and getting tasks done while still achieving the feeling that you’re accomplishing something.

Blessings,
Jacqui,Damselfly

Related articles

Travel and Packing Tips for Those Who Live with Pain – Pain Resource

Independent Living, , ,

Chronic pain sufferers can find travel and packing tips to ease the pain

Ask any kid on a school bus in June, summer is the season to be on vacation. But when you live with pain, jockeying for a spot at the beach or squeezing onto another overbooked flight are more than just nuisances—they’re triggers. To ensure your next trip away from home is full of well-deserved R&R, follow these tips on how to prepare, what to bring, and when to change your itinerary. Consider it your travel guide to a pain-free trip.

Start slow. Feel your best before you hit the road, says Rebecca Rengo, author of Beyond Chronic Pain: A Get-Well Guidebook to Soothe Body, Mind & Spirit. “Many people rush around trying to maintain regular activities, while getting the house, the kids, and their jobs in order, which increases stress,” she says. Instead, free up your schedule in the weeks leading up to your trip. It’ll give you plenty of time to get organized, decide what to pack, and maybe even fit in extra workouts or a massage. Remember: You’ll need the extra energy to handle the inevitable disruptions of traveling.

Read more on painresource.com

Jacqueline Goguen‘s insight:

Packing light might have seemed obvious to me, but her points about flying right gave me a kind a ah ha! moment. I’m still learning about my disability/limitations and often actually forget I have them. Until it’s too late and I’m suffering for it. A good read with some good tips.

Do you have any tips you can add to the list?

Blessings,
Jacqui

See on Scoop.it – Conquer Chronic Pain

 

Chronic Pain Can be Lonely: Nine Ways to Reconnect

Intimacy & Relationships, ,

goalistics.com – Chronic pain can make it hard to feel connected to others. Pain puts a strain on friendship – whether you have fibromyalgia, headaches, back pain, arthritis, or any other type of chronic pain. You may have found that you see friends less or that you feel disconnected when you do get together. You may have lost touch with some friends who you feel are too active – you may believe you just can’t keep up.

I know it sometimes take real effort on my part to stay connected and reach out to people. What about you? How have stayed connected, or re-connected. Share your experiences and tips in the comments below about what worked. Or what didn’t work.

Blessings, Jacqui

 

Related articles

Intensive Journal® Workshop – FAQs Part 2

Journaling & Healing, , , , ,

Question Mark green w creditYour Questions Answered cont…

Who leads the workshops?

Intensive Journal® workshops are conducted by trained and certified leaders (also called Journal Consultants) under the auspices of Dialogue House. The function of the leader is to guide you step-by-step through the process using the workshop guidelines provided by Dialogue House. They stay in the background, serving as a supportive and non-judgmental guide. Their role is to help you connect with your inner process, free from distractions in the workshop room. Therefore, our leaders do not use their personality to dominate or influence your process; they serve in a behind-the-scenes role to help you enter your process.

Our leaders come from a variety of backgrounds. They are teachers, artists, counselors, and ministers, to name a few of their occupations. While they may share some of their background and experiences with participants, they are not introducing their own philosophy. They are representing the philosophy of Dr. Progoff, as incorporated into the Intensive Journal® program.

Training and quality control are important components of our program. To become a certified instructor, our leaders must complete training in Dr. Progoff’s philosophy of psychological growth as well as attend many workshops. Their work is reviewed on an ongoing basis.

If you are interested in becoming a leader, Click here for more information.

Why does the price of a workshop vary by location?

Prices vary depending upon the cost of hosting the workshop at a certain location, the length of the program and whether meals are included. We try to offer reasonably priced programs and to be responsive to the needs of participants.

What happens at a workshop?

At your first workshop you receive your Intensive Journal® workbook. Not all of the sections will be used in the Life Context and Depth Contact workshops. These will be used in later modules of the Intensive Journal® series.

The workshop leader will guide participants through a series of journal sections based upon the structure developed by Dr. Ira Progoff in At a Journal Workshop. This structure is set up so that the sections complement each other and a continuous flow among them is achieved. The leader will explain each section and then allow time for participants to write in their workbooks.

Throughout the workshop the leader will allow time for questions about either the method or about the direction of a participant’s writing. This may be done one-on-one in order to protect the person’s privacy. The leader will also allow time for participants to read their work aloud. This is not meant to foster discussion about a person’s writing, but is for the purpose of connecting the reader to and evoking his or her emotions.

Try a Sample Intensive Journal® Exercise

Now you can begin to experience how the Intensive Journal® method works through a sample exercise. It is important to do the exercise in a setting of complete silence, with pen and paper (not computer), when you can relax and take your mind off your daily life. Record what comes to you; do not edit or censor. Write the date at the top of the page and the name of the exercise, “Period Log.” You should allow about 45 minutes to complete the exercise.

How can the Intensive Journal® method help deal with a specific issue?

Some people attend our program because they are facing important issues in a particular area of their lives. They hope to deal with or solve these issues during the workshop.

The role of the workshop is much broader – to help you connect with the multitude of experiences and emotions that comprise your unique life. Through this process, you can gain awareness and perspectives about the direction and continuity of your life, as well as realize strengths, interests and capacities. Then, after developing a foundation on your life, you may work through specific issues over time within the context of your entire life. We urge you not to place forced deadlines or pressures upon yourself. Sometimes, awareness occurs indirectly and at unpredictable times. We do not want to establish artificial expectations that would hinder the natural unfolding of awareness.

How do you proceed in the Intensive Journal® method after a workshop?

After you attend a workshop, it is recommended that you periodically work in your Intensive Journal® workbook. This use will help you become skilled in using the method as well as develop the material that you have begun in the workshop.

There are no set rules with regard to how often the method should be used. Some people find that it is helpful to set up a regular time to use the method. There may be times when you use the method frequently, and other times when you use it less. Your life will tell you how best to proceed.

You may also choose to attend another workshop of the same module or the next module in the series to further your knowledge of the Intensive Journal® method. The workshop provides the group atmosphere and discipline for using the method.

Using the method is a cumulative process with the benefits coming over time. Dr. Progoff states:

Since the principle underlying Journal Feedback™ is that of cumulative movement,  maintaining the Journal work has a multiplying effect if it is allowed to continue over significant units of time.. The key to working with the Intensive Journal process productively lies in the quality and quantity of the method that we feed into it….the Journal can feed back to us in self-transforming ways the material that we have recorded in it.

 At a Journal Workshop (rev. ed), p. 368

Shared from the Dialogue House Intensive Journal® website.

Intensive Journal® Workshop – FAQs Part 1